what your favorite song says about you

What your favorite song says about you:



If your favorite song is “Creep” by Radiohead: your favorite color is black because it is actually the absence of all color.

If your favorite song is “The Joker” by the Steve Miller Band: everyone in your group of friends low key hates you for being a flake, but they love you because you always offer to smoke them out.

If your favorite song is “How to Save a Life” by The Fray: you’re going to be a failure your whole life.

“Keep Ya Head Up” by 2Pac: You never have a shortage of incorrectly cited motivational quotes.

“Love Yourself” by Justin Bieber: You donated $20 to Amnesty International that one time, so you are definitely NOT selfish and Kelly can go fuck herself.

“September” by Earth, Wind, and Fire: You whisper-yell to the person next to you in the movie theater either “that looks good” or “I don’t get it” at the end of EVERY DAMN PREVIEW. THANKS SO MUCH FOR YOUR REVIEW; I WOULD HAVE BEEN LOST IN THE WORLD WITHOUT IT.

“Blue (Da Ba Dee)” by Eiffel 65: You were the kid in class who answered “yes” when the teacher legitimately forgot if they had assigned homework or not and had to ask the students for confirmation. This was of course right after the whole class had discussed how no one but you actually did the homework we ALL KNOW she assigned, but had AGREED AMONGST OURSELVES to say nothing if Mrs. Bartlett happened to ask. So fuck you, dude.

“Dirty Paws” by Of Mice and Men: Tell me again about all the amaaaaaaaazing people you met at Coachella.

“Miss You” by Blink-182: You’re going to murder the first person who breaks your heart.

“When We Were Young” by Adele: You really know what it means to struggle, because you once had to get soy milk instead of coconut milk at the coffee shop because they were all out.

“Stan” by Eminem and Dido: I’m telling you dude, she’s not looking at your Snapchats for a reason.

“Mirrors” by Justin Timberlake: You are definitely going to change people’s lives by sharing with them how you became independently “wealthy” with that special weight loss smoothie, face mask, makeup kit, or whatever the fuck you’re selling and littering my Facebook feed with.

Any of The Beatles songs: We get it, you don’t listen to anything but “real” music.

“Oops!...I Did It Again” by Britney Spears: you currently have a UTI.


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