thoughts i had when... "i was high"

in celebration of a very interesting holiday, we present: "Thoughts I Had When: I Was High"

  1. These gummy bears taste like a roller skating rink.  
  2. I know I'm high because I just took 20 selfies with your dog.    
  3. I think we should use a bowl of Cheerios as a centerpiece.
  4. There's nothing better than walking into your friends house and seeing an open bag of chips.
  5. I saw a plant. It was hilarious.
  6. I want to buy 50 yoplait whips.
  7. When eating yogurt, never think about what a "live active culture" is. It's terrifying. 
  8. Do rodeo clowns exist because I feel like they do.
  9. Do you think real estate is a noble profession? 
  10. That woman smelled like a Yankee candle from the 90's.
  11. There are not any ducks on this mountain. 
  12. Google what it means to hear 3 ducks. 
  13. The inside of blueberries aren't blue.
  14. That door made a very specific sound. 
  15. Of course I parked next to a mini van full of Pentecostals. (edit: this is a Jewish family)
  16. NPR knows that I'm smoking weed at 5:00 in the afternoon.